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You Do You! Positive Competition For The Win!

It’s that time of year.... everyone’s back at school.

Where did summer go? I blinked, May turned into September and now both of my kiddos are hitting the hallways in Middle School.

There are lot of feels with this transition. (I thoroughly address this topic in my blog, “An Ode To Motherhood: The Process of Growing.”) In my heart I absolutely know it’s as it should be. They’re turning into amazing, independent humans. However, that doesn’t necessarily make this time of year any easier to navigate!

The start of a new academic year in general, especially if attending a new school, is challenging. The emotions of how to be, think, feel, act, can be overwhelming. I know how hard too these feelings can hit parents, as they want to help their kids embrace the new.

With that being said, here are some important things to keep in mind as you navigate going back to school. These tips are applicable to all kids, big or small. Yep my friend, that means adults too! You Do You! First and foremost, always be yourself. When you’re living your own truth, you feel better in your own skin. Sure, it can be hard to ‘not conform’ to what others are doing. Trust me, that’s difficult at any age. But in the long run, you’ll feel better about yourself for being true to you. Others too, will see your authenticity shining through and will appreciate it.

Behavior Awareness. Be mindful of your own actions. This means being self-aware of what you may or may not be doing. It’s having knowledge of how your behavior impacts others. Do you have control over how other people act? Nope. But you always, yes always, have full control over your own behavior and how you respond to something.

Positive Competition. Competition is a huge part of our daily lives and when used correctly, can be a great thing. The difference between positive and negative competition is:

“Positive competition occurs when we compete healthily — in a way that brings out the best in us and everyone involved. It's a way to challenge yourself and others while pushing those around you. It allows you to tap into your potential and succeed.”

Positive competition is a way to inspire others, challenge yourself, and achieve your best potential. When used correctly it can be a motivator to increase effort and performance.

“Negative competition occurs when we compete with others so that we want to win at the expense of the other person or people involved. In other words, our success is predicated on their failure.”

Feeling inferior’ and striving to be ‘better than’ than others are often key drivers as to ‘why’ someone initiates negative competition. These actions are further enhanced by personal beliefs of ‘you’re good if you win, you’re bad, or a loser, if you fail.’

In a group environment consistent negative competition disrupts the culture, breaks down trust and harms the psychological safety of the environment. For those on the receiving end, negative competition frequently brings on feelings of anxiety or fear.

In the work I do, primary focusing on female rivalry behaviors, negative competition is often at the heart of why things turn ugly. When it’s on-going it turns into a form of bullying behavior. And the thing is, it doesn’t just apply to females, negative competition impacts everyone.

Knowing the difference between positive and negative competition is key! Understanding what drives you to compete and how, can help you evaluate your strengths and weaknesses. There are some wonderful benefits that result from positive competition. It can help to:

  • Bond with others

  • Boost work quality

  • Initiate creativity and magnify effort

  • Inspire others

  • Heightens productivity and alertness

As you support your kiddos when they hit the hallway this Fall and navigate being back at school, remember to share these key messages:

  1. You do YOU!

  2. Being mindful of your own actions!

  3. Positive competition, for the win!

You already are. It’s time TO BE.♥️

P.S. Stay tuned for my blog out next week about lessons learned from fishing.

I say that it’s time to be different. It’s time to talk about relationships and positive competition!


⁉️Interested in learning how ‘female rivalry’ impacts the workplace? 🎉DOWNLOAD my FREE .pdf guide, ‘5 Reasons WHY Good Women Walk’ to learn more!


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